So, I was standing at my host stand at the Downtown Lobster Pound last summer in Bar Harbor and a thirteen-year-old girl approached me. She seems very excited and had her camera out and was wearing a Johnny Depp t-shirt. She asked me, “I heard Johnny Depp was in town and I was wondering if you know where he is”, I replied, “He died”. She started sobbing and sobbing. Tears came pouring out. She yelled, “Don’t ever ever tell a teenage girl that Johnny Depp died like that!!!!”, I wondered, how I’m I suppose to tell her that Johnny Depp died. Is there like a manual for breaking celebrity death news to a teenage girl? She says, “There’s a way to tell young girls that their favorite celebrity died. First you say, ‘He’s on the roof’, so then I’m just worried like is he depressed or did he get a divorce, then next day you say, ‘He jumped and broke his legs, but the doctor says he’ll more likely make a full recovery’, so that way i’m still worried, but there’s still hope for me, then the third day you say, ‘I’m sorry, but he didn’t make it’. So that gives me three days to be prepared for the really bad news of Johnny Depp dying, so never ever say, ‘He died!!’ straight out like that”. The girl walked off sobbing.
Couple weeks later, I heard Justin Bieber was in town and that same girl came by my host stand with a camera and a Justin Bieber t-shirt. She was humming one of his hit songs and even brought a nice ring. I think she was gonna propose to him or something. So, anyway, she asked me, “I heard Justin Bieber is in Bar Harbor, do you know where he is??”, I replied, “Yeah. He’s on the roof”.